my dear best friends,
you know,
i dont know how to face you all anymore.
i realised,
for the sake of friendship,
i changed myself drastically.
i've got many things on my mind now and i know somehow,
one way or another i'm irritating you guys a lot.
everybody has their way of doing things and their way of looking at things.
i've tried to blend in with you guys do you know?
in primary sch, i was just some outcast.
i dont like to talk in sch and i stay away from the popular kids.
i dont have many friends because i embrace the quiet life i had.
in the past, i think about all kinds of things.
i think almost everywhere, anywhere, anytime.
thats why, sometimes i will unknowingly fall down or bang into a wall.
its because i'm deep in thoughts.
now, of course i still think as much.
i might be looking like i'm listening but i'm really not at times.
i would either be caught at your previous sentence trying to understand what you're saying or i would be busy thinking about other things.
but what i'm trying to say here,
is that,
the way you behave around me caught me thinking a lot.
you might not know but every single sound you make,
every single stare you give me,
every single glance you throw at me can set me thinking.
i'm the type that is very emotional and hard to get along with.
but because of one word,
friends,
i became what you all know.
and the side of me that you all think is very attitude is actually the real me.
when i'm quiet,
you say i mood swing but actually,
its the real me.
and now,
i'm being more me each day but its not making things for you guys easy.
and you guys are getting unhappy with me each day.
and when i try to be hyper to hide the strong emotions i'm feeling,
i irritate you like mad.
so now, i dont know what to do.
i'm losing my friends and i dont know how to get them back anymore.
its just like i'm losing you and i dont know what to do.